Armando Iannucci - Boris's barnet for bad boys

After a court ruling, I have been ordered to publish my expenses. My expenses for last week are:

1) Hawk: £145.37

2) Hawk training: £650

3) Three Jersey cows as hawk-prey: £3,200

4) Purchase of balloons with face of Jersey cow on them: £23

5) Taxi to BBC TV studios for recording of I'd Do Anything: £17.54

6) Waiting time and return journey of taxi, while I go into BBC TV Centre and hold three balloons with cow heads on them near Andrew Lloyd Webber's face and then release hawk: £219.43 but worth every penny.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/apr/06/boris/